Thank you all for your encouragement yesterday. Being surrounded by so much love is definitely a help! After whining to several friends, getting a really good night's sleep, and playing games all morning--err, day (oh crap...how is it already after 3:00??) with Michael and the kids and laughing so much I was crying and my abs hurt, I'm feeling much better. I might dip back into the doldrums when I go back to treatment tomorrow, but I know y'all will help me through it.
And really, I know this is temporary, and it'll only last a few weeks. Someone suggested I do something to count down the treatments like I did with chemo. I wasn't going to because A. there are so damned many and B. I didn't expect to have such a hard time with it. But, I think it's a great idea and maybe it'll help keep me positive. Now, I need some ideas! The chain of loops was awesome but there will be too many. What else can I do? I will be shredding the chemo loops to keep in decorative jars. Maybe something that can also go in the jars? Thinking caps, people!
And you know what? Despite all this crap, I am the happiest I've ever been. I'm with a great guy who treats me well and takes care of me, we live with his fun kids and laugh every day, and I'm financially secure. I have just one more bump in the road, and it's a sucky one, but in the grand scheme of things it's not so bad. Warrior on!